Welcome to the home of The Great American Grump Out™
It was coming May 6, 2015. Then it was HERE! Now it's gone until next May 4, 2016.
Until then, enjoy these web pages about common, ordinary, garden-variety GRUMPS and become super successful in the fine art of Upscale Grump Survival for next year's Grump Out.
Once a year, on the first Wednesday in May, there is a fun little tongue-in-cheek 'holiday' inspiring us to be a little less grumpy. (For real)
It's The Great American Grump Out.™
The Grump Out™ urges people to go for just 24 hours without being grumpy, crabby or rude. A WHOLE DAY. 24 little hours.
How hard could that be ?!?
Yet for many, this becomes a frustrating, agonizing, gut-wrenching challenge. Off in the corner, or far in the distance, someone is cursing and belly aching about what a drag it is to have to do this dumb thing. Others are throwing hissy-fits, furious about having to make a change for one day in their life. Crowds gather, protest signs appear and loud, angry chanting begins.
"We have a right to grump!!"
"Smilers go home!!"
"This is not fair!!"
Yes, you have the right to grump. The Grump Out™ is not to offend, insult or deny anyone of their inalienable right to grump. Please feel free to grump 365 days a year. (366 on leap year) The Grump Out™ is looking for brave, open-minded souls who dare take one day off from grumping and tackle the day's challenge.
"Hey, don't forget about me!"
EVERYONE is invited to participate in the next Great American Grump Out™ on May 4, 2016. Even the crankiest person can take a crack at it. They may not make the 24 hours but 10 seconds is a good start.
Are you up for a challenge?
The cards are stacked against those hard core grumps, but we have faith and hope!
The Great American Grump Out™ is held on "Hump Day". Imagine the week like a hill. Monday and Tuesday you are going up the hill. Thursday and Friday are downhill., hence, Wednesday is the "Hump" of the hill. Therefore it's called Hump Day.
The Great American Grump Out™ is always held on the first Wednesday in May, hump day. It's a day to focus on humor, self awareness and positive behaviors to lighten up the seriousness and stresses of the world for 24 hours.
The Banana is the official fruit of the Grump Out™
The banana is a humble fruit. It comes in a convenient, biodegradable, neon-yellow wrapper. A banana is:
The banana satisfies both the grump and the non-grump. Hold it one way, it's a smile. Turn it upside down and it's a frown.
The banana is an ideal, drug-free snack. It is a natural remedy for many ills, making it one of nature's healthy medicines. They are rich in fructooligosaccarides. (This is a real word. )
A banana a day keeps the doctor away, but not a monkey.
An apple a day keeps the doctor away. Not a banana. Not a monkey.
Deciding whether the apple or the banana is the healthiest for you is like choosing between good and better.
Health is in the eyes of the beholder.
"You're the apple of my eye." Not many say, "You're the banana of my eye."
"You're driving me bananas." Not many say, "You're driving me apples."
"You're the apple of my eye and you're driving me bananas."
"You're the banana of my eye and you're driving me apples."
Banana's Medicinal Uses
Nervous? Eat a banana.
PMS? Eat a banana.
Insomnia? Eat a banana.
Hangover? Eat a banana.
Can't smile? Strap a banana to your face.
Fun Banana Nutrition
Here are just 2 fun, homemade, no-bake banana recipes in the Grump Guide. The recipes are made from fruits, pretzels, mixed nuts and a few other common goodies. Oh, and don't forget chocolate, we can't forget chocolate.
You will need:
Puree the bananas. Combine the pureed bananas, grapefruit juice, lemon sherbet and crushed ice. Stir and serve.
Banana Birthday Cake
For the calorie conscious, use a banana. Stand the banana facing up so it looks like it is smiling at you. Carve little holes in the skin to insert candles on the top. After placing the candles in the banana, scratch the person's name on the side of the banana skin. It magically appears later.
Challenge: Stuff a banana in your mouth and sing Happy Birthday.
Other fun banana recipes included in the Grump Survival Guide:
Did this make you smile? Then you have helped lighten up the planet today. Thank you.
Janice A. Hathy BS, HB Grumpologist firstname.lastname@example.org